My words cannot match the anquish I feel as the war with Israel and Hezzbolah continues. The words of the mother of a young man I met in Israel a few months ago are much more poignant and profound.
A MOTHER SENDS HER SON OFF TO WAR
The following was written today by Birmingham Jewish community member Janet Reagan. Her son, Michael, who is pictured here and who grew up in Birmingham, moved to Israel two and a half years ago.
As I write this, it is Shabbat both in America and in Israel. Being raised as a good Conservative Jew, I am not supposed to communicate in writing today. Especially not with other Jews, not to violate their Day of Rest, of Peace. But, we also are not to wage war on the Sabbath either. For over two and a half years, I have spoken almost every week with my son, Michael, who has moved to Israel. He has written the most amazing travel journals; he has found his passion and voice. Michael went through not one, but two Hebrew language training courses, in his desire to be able to communicate in Hebrew as an Israeli. He was too old to serve in the military, and was turned down three times. But Michael was adamant that Israel was now his country, his home, and he must be able to defend it. Stubborn man that he is, he would not take no for an answer, and finally was accepted to serve as a “Lone Soldier” (one with no family in Israel, which includes a very large amount of young people from all over the world). I had to sign notarized documents that my only son could serve in combat. Finally, this past June 26th, his training and active duty were over. THOUGHT HE WOULD NOT BE CALLED Michael’s determination and good old Southern grit served him well. At 29, he bested many 18 and 19 year-olds in physical challenges, especially stamina and marksmanship. When July 12th and the “new war” began, my brothers and I were so thankful that the policy of the Israel Defense Forces is to allow a year between active duty and active reserves. Michael would not be called. I just knew it; I was so sure. I phoned Michael every day for 10 days. He wrote unbelievable accounts of what was happening in Kibbutz Yagur, a virtual suburb of Haifa, in northern Israel. Then, one day, he said, “Don’t call me anymore.” Later that day I received an eloquent apology. In a very personal communiqué my son spoke of the struggle and moral dilemma between his humanity and his hatred and innate desire to preserve the Jewish people at any cost. However, he could no longer speak with me daily about the war. His pain was palpable in his explanation of why he didn’t want me to call him everyday. In the meantime, I stopped flipping between Fox, MSNBC and CNN. I read the Daily Alert, an email prepared by the Conference of Presidents of Major American Jewish Organizations/Jerusalem Center for Public Affairs, and selected the story links I feel I must read. CALLS, EMAILS ASKING ‘HOW’S MICHAEL?’ Everyday, came the calls, the emails, the voices: “How’s Michael?” And everyday I answered: “Michael’s fine, he’s on the Kibbutz, he’s through with active duty, and he’s not an active reservist. Michael’s fine.” Today, Michael called. “Call me back NOW on my cell phone,” he said. Dialing, I did just that. Michael had been called by the army to “report immediately.” An hour and a half later, he was speaking to me as he walked on to the army base. Where he was, I don’t know. Whenever I have asked him where his base is, he’s answered, “In Israel.” It doesn’t matter. He is awaiting his assignment. He won’t go south to Gaza, although he was involved in last year’s pullout. He wasn’t “desert-trained.” He was trained for the type of combat that Israel is engaged in “up north.” God-willing he will cover a post so someone else’s son can go north — how guilty do I feel wishing that? When he finds out where he is going, if he can call, he will. Michael’s voice was strong. He is ready. I’m not. I want him behind a desk far away from any war front. But, I pray that he will go where he needs to go, do what he needs to do, and be okay when he’s done. PLEAS TO GOD All the soldiers that I have prayed for, all of my pleas to God for peace have not prepared me for this. But that is insignificant. Michael and millennia of young warriors have been and will be prepared to secure the future of our people. That’s what Jews do. We do everything in our power to perpetuate our people, to spread our humanity, to restore dignity century after century after century. That’s what we do. That’s what our soldiers do. That was someone else’s child’s destiny. Not my Michael’s.
Janet Reagan jreagan@bham.rr.com
*** The following came from Janet two hours after she sent the above email: “I just heard from Michael again. He will be in Lebanon in 24 hours, says that he’ll talk to me when he gets back.”